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  • Jo Stone

Does a Coach Need a Coach?

Does a coach need a coach? YES! We all do! A few years ago I found myself in a job where I was really unhappy, I had an over powering and frankly bully of a boss. My self-esteem was incredibly low. And I simply did not have enough confidence in myself to even secure a job interview. This was unusual for me. I have always had a lot of confidence that I can do and be anything I want to be, I knew my worth and often got offered jobs at the end of an interview. And suddenly I found myself crippled by self doubt and no self worth. No wonder I couldn’t get an interview! If I didn't even believe in myself, why would anyone else? I was so unhappy and knew I needed to do something to get myself out of the hole I was sinking in. So I found myself a life coach. She wasn't cheap but I knew I needed to invest in myself to grow and move forwards. I found her online, we had a short intro call and I just liked her, the energy felt good, so I went ahead and booked five sessions. I didn't know what to expect. She challenged me on my perceptions which could be very black and white. And she helped me find ways to react less emotionally and more from a rational point of view. This differs for everyone, we all respond differently and have different ways of seeing the world. For me, I am a visual person, and one tool I learnt was to picture myself inside a huge glass dome. With only me inside it, I pictured the energy as very calm and serene and imagined very calming classical music playing inside my dome. And this dome was made of thick impenetrable glass - so no matter what was being thrown my way it couldn't reach me. And I could safely observe from behind my peaceful glass wall what was going on. For whatever reason, this worked for me. It allowed me to detach from a situation and observe it from a much calmer, less personal perspective. It gave me mental space and protection. It wasn't easy, and sometimes I really struggled to take on board what she was trying to coach me on. Many years on I have actually learnt those lessons she was helping me to be open to back then. But maybe at that time I just wasn’t in the right place on my journey to be able to process and understand them. Life changes, different challenges are thrown at us, and we grow and evolve and our personal paradigms evolve with us. Many years on I am a qualified coach - but this doesn't mean I don’t benefit from coaching myself. I still have challenges in the workplace, with my career and now with launching my new Group Coaching Programme in 2021. I still have self doubt, limiting beliefs and sometimes feel overwhelmed. This doesn't mean I am any better or worse at coaching my own clients. It simply means - I am human. We all are. Our psyche is built to look out for danger and respond to warning signals with worry/concern/fear/anxiety. It is natural. It is just about having the self awareness to be able to observe and choose how to respond to those signals that makes the difference. For me, having a coach provides me with a safe space to focus on my own challenges or goals, to shut out the rest of the world for 90 minutes and work with my coach on moving further on my journey of growth. All coaches should have a coach, we all should!

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